Who is the most bizarre person you have ever met?

This is a terrible question. It’s not that the question itself is terrible, it’s that I know way too many bizarre people. I have found that, the better you get to know people, the more bizarre they become.

There are people who seem completely average on the surface until you spend a few years getting to know them only to find out that they enjoy painting themselves green, sewing limes into their skin and injecting their balls with saline.

Then there are the freakshow people with tattoos everywhere and earlobes with holes the size of basketball hoops. You’re inclined to believe that these people are truly bizarre, but they mostly wear their oddness on the outside. Inside, they’re more normal than the guy who paints himself green.

I know some circus sideshow performers. I know people who play with fire. I know a girl who has a stripper pole in her living room. She enjoys hanging herself from hooks inserted in her flesh. I know a clown. I know an albino. I have friends who make puppets. I know a guy who owns an old firetruck. I know burlesque performers and roller derby girls. I know people who look like they’re going to fall over when they dance, but they never do. I know artists, musicians, performers. I have friends who tattoo and pierce people for a living. I know people who have nearly every inch of flesh tattooed, some even on their faces. I know a guy who made his own potato gun. I know people who climb mountains and run marathons for fun. I know people who have sex on camera. I know people who film people having sex on camera. I know a mortician who has pictures of serial killers all over the walls of his apartment.

All of these people are bizarre in their own way just like all the seemingly normal, workaday office workers I know. Even the most average person has their peccadilloes and peculiarities. Bizarre is a truly subjective word. It’s all a matter of the line you’ve drawn for yourself in the sand.

Humans, by our very nature, are bizarre creatures. It’s what makes our species unique. We push boundaries and advance our limits. What’s bizarre to some cultures is normal to others. What was bizarre a hundred years ago is perfectly acceptable today. I’m probably bizarre to some; to others, I’m totally vanilla. We’re all bizarre in our own way. It’s all a matter of perspective. So, let your inner freak out. Raise your freak flag high because no one is as bizarre as you.