To The Guy Parked In Front Of My House

2013-11-03 08.13.22

Forgive me for assuming you are a guy, however, I feel fairly confident in my gender assessment of you without having laid eyes on you, but only your vehicle. Allow me to explain.

Your truck with its V8 engine, 4-wheel drive and dual rear wheels is one of the largest trucks I’ve ever seen outside of a monster truck rally, not that I’ve ever been to a monster truck rally. I’m sure that off-road capability comes in very handy in Los Angeles.

My assumption that you’re a man is definitely not meant to imply that women don’t drive pickup trucks, because I know several women who do. It’s just that women don’t typically drive trucks that large in a densely populated city, because why? Also, on your rear bumper was an anti-abortion sticker. There are plenty of women out there who don’t believe in abortion, but in my experience, almost every time I see a pro-life sticker on a car, it’s a guy driving for whatever reason.

I’ve never met a woman who would put a sticker on her giant truck that said “I’VE ALWAYS BEEN PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN!!!” in all caps with three exclamation points no less and an American flag sticker underneath, just to avoid any confusion, I suppose.

Really? You’ve always been proud to be American? When you first popped out of your mother, when you had no idea what America even was, you were proud to have been born inside of some man-made imaginary boundary? I can honestly say, I’ve never been proud to be an American in the same way that I’ve never been proud to be born a woman or to have been born white. All three of those circumstances are things I had absolutely no control over and I can’t find any reason to be proud of a random occurrence I had nothing to do with at all.

On the contrary, I’ve often been ashamed to be an American. There have been times where I considered leaving this country because it is so incredibly fucked up, but not you, dear neighbor. You’re proud. You’re proud of unmanned drone strikes on civilian populations. You’re proud of the countless “military actions” we’ve perpetrated on innocent civilians that we, the citizens, aren’t even aware of. You’re proud of your own government spying on you and keeping track of your cell phone records. You’re proud of Guantanamo Bay where countless people are held without due process for years and even tortured. You’re proud of this great nation spying on the German Chancellor and allowing states like Texas to slowly chip away at women’s rights. Well, good for you, but I’m not proud. Generally, I reserve pride for accomplishments that I had a hand in.

As for your “STOP OBAMA CARE” sentiment, I’d really like to ask why? Why do you and others like you want to stop me and millions of Americans from receiving affordable health care?

You see, I have nothing now–no health, dental, vision or even urgent care. I have no safety net because I can’t afford one. I used to have health insurance. I paid for it myself. It was crappy health insurance with a really high deductible. It started off at $109 a month. I used it a couple of times. Every two to three months, I got another notice that either my out-of-pocket expense limit was being raised or that my monthly premium was going up. In less than three years, it more than tripled in cost. In less than three years, it went from $109 a month with $2500 out-of-pocket expense to $356 a month where I had to pay $10,000 out-of-pocket before it would kick in. I couldn’t afford to use it. I canceled my policy. I haven’t had health insurance since.

That’s my story and I know many like it. So, I ask you, dear neighbor, why do you want that kind of exploitation by big health insurance companies to continue? I’m really honestly trying to understand why you don’t want me to have affordable health care, because all the arguments I’ve heard sound ridiculous in the face of someone dying because they can’t afford health insurance. For some of us, it is a matter of life and death.

Regarding the “PRO-LIFE” sticker on your bumper that I didn’t capture in the photograph, I’d like to ask you what makes you think you have a right to take a very personal decision out of my hands? Even if you are a woman, which I don’t think you are, whether you decide to get an abortion or not is still your choice. It is always your choice. That’s the way it should be. If you don’t agree with abortion, don’t get one, but why must you take it away from others? I am lactose intolerant. I can’t eat dairy, but I would never tell anyone else that they can’t eat dairy just because I don’t. What you believe is what you believe, and that’s fine, but when it infringes on my rights, we have a problem.

By the way, are you aware that you parked your truck in an arts district? Artists are typically pretty liberal, at least, in this neighborhood, they definitely are. I’m not sure if you noticed, but the car parked in front of you had some bumper stickers, too. One was for peace, another said coexist and a third was this:


I’ve never put bumper stickers on my car for a few reasons. There’s the fact that once you put them on, you can’t take them off easily. Even when I was a kid and had a sticker book, if at all possible, I didn’t stick them to the book. I kept the backing on them so I could use them somewhere else if I wanted. I’ve always been like that.

But, more importantly than recycling stickers, I don’t like people making assumptions about me as I drive down the road as I just did to you in this post. I made assumptions of you based on what you chose to put on the back of your car. Correct me if I’m wrong, but that’s kind of the point of bumper stickers. You put them on your car to express your opinions. My opinions are mine, just as yours are yours. I’ve never been one to put them on my bumper.

This post is full of assumptions and I do apologize for that. I don’t like making snap judgments of people, but it can’t be helped. Perhaps you are a very different person than your truck would lead me to believe. If that’s the case, I owe you an apology. However, you’re the one who put it out there without giving me a chance to debate your opinions with you personally, which is why I wrote this letter.

Oh, and P. S. – You parked like an asshole.