I don’t really have any. Well, I do have hobbies: I read, I draw, I write, I shoot things, I sing badly in the car and I think about maybe wanting to learn how to play violin someday. It’s just that none of those things are particularly social. The things I do are all solitary activities. At least, for the benefit of the ears around me, I hope they are.

I have a friend with a bicycle. Lots of people have friends with bikes, you say. And that is possibly true, but my friend with a bike pretty much does nothing but bike. She meets up with other people who bike, talks about biking while biking, and most annoyingly, talks about biking when she’s not biking. I don’t have a bicycle. Mine got stolen some years back and I never replaced it. My friend has carved out a social hobby for herself with people who are also interested in talking about bicycles all the time. I am not one of those people, which is why I don’t hang out with her all that much anymore. Anyway, my point is that I don’t have any social hobbies.

The other day, Male and I were sitting around my house bored out of our minds. We couldn’t think of anything to do that would make us less bored. I said, “I need a hobby,” to which he replied, “You have a hobby; you have a dog.” A dog is not a hobby, no matter how much my life tends to revolve around her lately. A sentient creature cannot be a hobby.

I am not very sporty. I never have been. I’ve got bad blood circulation and will fall over like a fainting goat with too much activity.

Hi, Mr. Goat. How are you today?
Oh. He fell over.

I’ve never enjoyed collecting things like coins, stamps, action figures or trading cards. Although, this one totally rocks:

I’m not big on mountain biking (no bike), golfing, swimming, hiking, squash, tennis, or any of the other sport type things people do for fun. I’m terrible at darts and billiards because I never learned how to play. I still don’t know how to play chess.

Plus, I’m just not very competitive. When I play games with my friends, if I’m trouncing someone, I subconsciously start self-sabotaging because I feel bad instead of going for the jugular. Sometimes, I catch myself doing that when I’m playing against a computer.

So, what does that leave, really? I don’t know. Does anyone have any hobbies that are social and awesome? What do you like to spend your time doing?