1. What is your name (real or otherwise)?
Goldfish is my name. It’s not the name my parents gave me, but it is a real nickname.
2. Describe your writing style in three words.
Eclectic, Ridorkulous, Short-Attention-Span (if you hyphenate it, it’s one word, right?).
3. How long have you been writing online?
Since Myspace, however long ago that was. A long time by internet years. I started a proper blog at Blogger in 2007 or 2008, and moved to WordPress in 2009.
4. Which, if any, other writing challenges do you participate in?
5. Describe one way in which you could improve your writing.
I have a tendency to write awkward sentences, e.g., I put subjects after verbs like Yoda. I usually end up having to go back and rearrange. It would be nice if I could get them in the right order out of the gate. Also, I need to add more humor to my fiction. I can write funny blog posts, but have yet to write some funny fiction. And while we’re being truthful, I really need to start editing before I publish.
6. What is the best writing advice you’ve ever been given?
Add more unicorns. Honestly, I can’t remember any writing advice that I’ve been given, which isn’t surprising since I can’t really remember anything. Let’s go with the experts, shall we?
7. Who is your favorite author?
How on earth can you expect a writer to only have one favorite author? That’s like asking a chef for only one ingredient. It ain’t gonna happen. If I have to pick a desert island author, it would be Bukowski. If I have to pick the most technically brilliant author of prose, it would be Conrad. If I have to pick one author who just had all his damn ducks in a proper row, Shakespeare. Best mystery writer, Chandler. Funniest, Douglas Adams. This could go on forever.
8. How do you make time to write?
I slack at my job a lot. I’m not paid enough to actually work for eight hours a day. My salary is worth about five hours of solid work at most. I don’t feel too badly about it, because when I am working, I accomplish a lot.
9. Give us one word we should consider using as a prompt. Remember–it must have a third definition.
He beat up the DJ because he didn’t like the beat, then he beat it out of there only to have his heart skip a beat when he ran right into a policeman on his beat.
10. Direct us to one blog post of yours that we shouldn’t miss reading.
Hm. Tough one. I couldn’t pick, so I asked a friend and he said The World’s Dumbest Cat.