Dear Consumer of Antique Computing Machines

(oddee.com)

It’s been approximately five hundred and thirty two years since I’ve done a daily prompt, but since it’s NaBloPoMo and I get a little panicky about things to write about during November, I’ll take a stab at yesterday’s:

The year is 2214, and your computer’s dusty hard drive has just resurfaced at an antique store. Write a note to the curious buyer explaining what he or she will find there.

Dear consumer of antique computers,

Congratulations on your purchase! If you’re reading this, it means that somehow, this hard drive is still functional, which is impressive, since it barely functioned for me a long time ago.

Anyway, good job on selecting this one because it contains all sorts of treasures. Allow me to guide you through what you will find.

This drive was in a personal computer that I used for work (meaning that I own it, not necessarily that it’s a PC, which it also is), so disregard anything in the folder labeled “Work,” because it’s just boring work crap that no one cares about. Although, if you’re interested in some old-timey advertisements, you’ll find some there. I’m sure they’ll look as quaint to you as this does to me:

(oddee.com)
(oddee.com)

Anyway, back to the tour.

I’m happy to inform you that you just won the musical lottery! You were discerning enough to buy a drive that has an excellent and very large music collection. A folder called iTunes Music has a treasure trove of music from the past. There is music from all cultures, genres and time periods. All the music is at least 200 years old, but there is some really ancient stuff, too. The oldest songs in that folder are traditional melodies that go back hundreds of years.

While you’re browsing, I recommend that you find an application called iTunes in the Applications folder and click play. You should be able to listen to music for the next two months without hearing the same song twice. Enjoy.

Also in the Applications folder, you’ll find two different versions of the Adobe Creative Suite, because only parts of each work properly. I would recommend using Photoshop CS5, because the CS6 version crashes constantly. InDesign CS6 is fine for one file, but if you open more than one file at a time, it will freeze. Just right-click (is right-clicking still a thing?) on the application and click force quit. Illustrator, which I used most, is always good though. You can use any version without a problem at all.

The good stuff is in the Play folder. In there, you will find many other folders. There’s one called Blog that has drafts of a lot of the posts I wrote on my blog. Do you know what a blog is? Do they still have those? Anyway, you’ll find drafts for my blog in there. I had a blog called fishofgold.net. It probably doesn’t exist anymore.

A folder called Books currently has eight different drafts in it. Those are eight drafts of books that I started and just never finished. I’m sorry about that. I would love to give you endings, but apparently, I’m not very good at those. There is one completed children’s story in there though.

A folder called Autobiography has the complete story of my life in it (well, complete up to about 10 years ago for me). It hasn’t been edited, so it’s still pretty rough, but it will give you an excellent idea of how people, namely me, lived long ago. I’m not a typical example of life in the 20th/21st century though, so take it with a grain of salt.

There’s a folder called Designs that has all sorts of stuff in it including freelance projects I did, self portraits and other random drawings.

There’s a folder called Shop that has digital drawings of little animals. I used to sell those. Funny, huh? Somewhere in the world, there are signed copied of those lying around, although the ink has probably faded by now. This is what they look like. Do these animals still exist or are they extinct now? I don’t know why I’m asking since it’s not like you can answer me.

animals

The rest is just assorted junk really. You’ll find a ton of random spreadsheets in there. I used spreadsheets to help make decisions. Feel free to disregard those since they don’t matter much to anyone, including me. There are images that I pulled from the internet here and there, pictures I took with my phone (mostly of my dog), and tons of other random files that I probably can’t remember what they are even now. I’m a bit of a pack rat and I don’t go through and clean off my hard drive as often as I should.

Anyway, that’s about it. I hope you enjoy my old hard drive and that it works better for you than it worked for me most of the time.